Wednesday, November 14, 2012

A Little BDSM Chat

I've had a couple of questions about BDSM lately... the answer is... you're better off looking it up on the internet. I could definitely write a whole blog about BDSM, but I am by no means an expert. I dabble and I write, but I don't live the lifestyle. I play in it a bit and I'd like to do more - am learning how to do more with hubby - but I haven't gone as far as most of the characters in my books. 

Spanking? Love it. Same with flogging and cropping - although I've never had anyone get particularly rough with those.  Bondage? More fun. I haven't had a cane used on me before. Electricity - had someone use a violet wand on me once, just so I could see how it feel, on low level (really liked it). I'm looking into maybe eventually getting one of my own to play with. Domination/submission? Done some of it... Hubby's more of a 'top' than a "Dom," which mostly means that he's not really into giving orders. However, I've been in a club where there were Doms and I've heard them giving orders and.... just yum. Nipple clamps hurt like a BITCH but I want to try them again soon. And wax. 

So all of that is what you'll mostly see in my stories, although my characters end up going through rougher stuff than I do in real life.  And I'd make a very bad slave.  What's a slave as opposed to a sub? Well a submissive is someone who wants to submit in the bedroom, maybe a little bit outside of it. Doms and subs play together.  A Master and slave live the lifestyle, a 24/7 Total Power Exchange (TPE) where the Master makes all of the decisions.  There is something called 'high etiquette' which governs the rules of behavior for the slave. A Dom and sub will lay out guidelines for what is permissible in the bedroom and the sub can always call out a safeword to end the scene, often they are giving a slow down word as well.  Masters and slaves might have a few guidelines for how far the punishment, etc. is allowed to go, but for the most part everything is up to the Master and the slave does not need to be consulted beforehand. In this situation the slave does still have a safeword, but saying it ends the relationship rather than just the scene. At least, this is my understanding of the basic differences, although of course every relationship is different and unique to the two people with in it; there are all sorts of varying degrees between a 24/7 TPE and Dom and subbing.

The Venus characters are going to show off a lot of these different kinds of relationships.  It's already pretty obvious that Justin is a stricter Dom than Chris or Liam and that Liam prefers BDSM which has less to do with bondage and more to do with domination. He wants to give an order and have it followed - telling someone to keep their hands in a position as opposed to tying their hands into that position and leaving them no choice.  Eventually, when I start the Stronghold series, I'll be getting into some other aspects of BDSM; I want each Dom character to have his own specialty / preferences which will be explored in each book. Chances are none of them are going to go the full Master/slave route (because I'm not sure I would be able to write it convincingly) but Patrick is probably going to be pretty close to that. He's definitely the strictest out of the Stronghold Doms.

There are also pets, which are slaves that are kept more like animals - cages, leashes, tail plugs, etc. 

Daddy Doms have Baby-Girls, a form of infantalization that doesn't always go all the way to the infant level. Eventually I want to write a Daddy Dom story, I'm still working on a plot line for it (Not within the Venus/Stronghold universe, but probably for Lit).

And then there are the Dommes, like Olivia in my Venus series. Dominatrixes run their own gamut but they also have an option for 'sissification.'  That's when they turn their boy slave/sub into a 'little girl'. Dressing them in panties, fucking their 'pussies,' etc. I haven't entirely decided what kind of Domme Olivia is going to be yet. She's playing elusive with me, because I don't think she knows what direction she wants to go in yet - there are so many options. I do know that she likes boys and girls and that she's a very strict Domme, but she doesn't have a permanent sub at the moment and I'm not sure what she's looking for in one. Should be interesting to play with eventually. 

So yeah. Working on Chapter 8 of Being the Maid.  Garrett's getting a lot more showtime in this chapter, now that he's split off from the main group there's a lot more going on from his POV. I've also come up with something new and different from those back at the campsite which I hope everyone will end up enjoying. This is a fun chapter because Bridget's feeling pretty feisty after the events of Chapter 8. 

The Contest Alternate chapter is coming along really well.  There are some days when I'm like "Man I'm good! This is awesome! I'm so creative! And awesome!" and then the next day I'm like "Wtf was I thinking, I SUCK!". This is not one of those days. I'm still stuck on the "Man I'm awesome!" train hahahaha. I think I've come up with some new little maneuvers that I hope people will enjoy reading about.  I love it when I figure out something new for my characters to do during sex. Especially because I keep thinking I've run out of things that they could do, but then I end up with a character who has a super twisted mind and BOOM. Crazy, kinky stuff is happening. Makes me happy, hopefully it will everyone else too! 

And in the meantime, I've finished yet another chapter of Venus Desiring.  This is definitely going to be a longer book than Aspiring was, so it's going to take longer too but I'm really happy with what's going on with it so far.  I'm 8 chapters in and going strong, somewhere between halfway and 2/3 of the way complete. 

I think I've decided how Witch is going to end, so hopefully it won't take me long to complete that once Contest Alternate is done. After I complete Witch I'm going to finish Instruction because I feel bad that I always promised I'd continue that one and it's gotten SO many requests for me to do so that I want to live up to that. Both of those should be finished up with two more chapters for each of them and after that I'll be getting back to new reader requests. 

Happy Hump Day everyone!

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